I'm back...sort of

My ability to drop off the face of the Earth really is superb. My secret? Contract laryngitis. Yes, ladies and gentleman, if you too would like to drop off the face of the Earth and not leave your bed for an entire week, an upper respiratory infection is for you. While I've had laryngitis I have had only the most convenient things happen to me. This is the only week of the entire semester I have had two clarinet lessons in one week, I've had to cancel both, so needless to say my teacher (who doesn't care for me much anyway) is a little irked. I had a math test over logarithms and exponential functions, which I don't understand on any day, let alone a day when my sinuses are about ready to fall out my ears. But Wednesday tops it all. Yes, Wednesday most definitely takes the cake. Out of the entire semester, the one week I have a SPANISH ORAL EXAM, is the week I get laryngitis. Wednesday morning I woke up feeling like I was punched in the face twice by Mike Tyson, run over by a semi, closely followed by a train and then stampeded upon by a herd of obese camels. I did manage to get to my test on time (7:50 AM) and I opened my mouth to speak to the other students waiting to take the speaking test and....nothing. I had completely lost my voice. I sounded like the tiniest, squeakiest mouse. Somehow, everyone else (including my teacher) found this rather amusing. But never fear, I did make it through the test by holding the microphone right in front of my face. Now, on Friday I am sounding much more like a 60 year old male chain smoker, which has given me back my ability to communicate with others. My voice has also been compared to the chocolate lady from Spongebob. If you don't know what I'm talking about and you're under the age of 25, I'm very disappointed. So, to close, I'd like to leave another one of my famous little college tips: Bring more medicine. Bring dayquil, nyquil, sudafed, excedrin, advil, tums, whatever you can think of for any disease you could possibly contract. If your RA doesn't think you're a drug dealer, then you're doing it wrong. Take the number of times you've been sick in your entire life times 4 times and that's how often you will get sick in college. Bring. dem. meds.

In case you are one of the poor souls that never watched Spongebob, here's the chocolate lady. The show isn't actually in black and white, but that's the best I could find. Curse you copyright laws.